I heard someone once said, “motherhood is sanctifying” and I totally agree. God uses parenting to sanctify us and make us more and more like Him. Before becoming a mother, I had no priorities, I lived carefree and I didn’t really take time to nurture myself. But this has changed now that I am a mom of five little precious lives (6, 5, 3 year olds, 17 months and 34 weeks pregnant). I have had to set boundaries in place to help me care for my soul and spirit when I realized I was hurting the very people I love due to burnout.
Have you heard of the expression that says, “hurt people hurt others?” I believe the opposite is also true; that “loved people love others.” This is God’s desire for us moms. He desires to lead us to a place of TLC: tend, love and care for ourselves. How do we go about tending, loving, and caring for ourselves? Here are five key ways to avoid burnout that have helped replenish myself.
“You can’t pour from an empty cup.”
Key #1 Water Your Life
Do something good for yourself once a day. I have realized the necessity of taking “time outs” to replenish. You and I can’t serve nor care for anyone on empty. We will eventually stop or lose our mind. Some ways to do this are:
- Have a date with yourself. Even as an extrovert, this has been so refreshing to me. I use this time to reflect on my day, week or month.
- Challenge yourself to read a book you can enjoy.
- Pamper yourself with a massage or have a coffee date with a friend.
Key #2 Remove the Dead Weight
Fears and lies have been the dead weights that weigh me down. We can’t be the moms God has called us to be when we allow Satan to take a seat in our minds and counsel us.
- Write down a list of all the things that worry you about your kids and bring it before God. He will fill you with His love that casts out fear.
- Any guilt and condemnation you feel aren’t truth, but lies from the enemy.
Key # 3 Prune Suckers
Prune the good activities and the busyness to promote health. Yes, you read it right. In order to flourish, you have to get rid of the good things in your life that are stopping you from producing the best fruit. How do you do that?
- Prioritize and organize your life in a way that you can say no to good things in order to be available to say yes to the right thing.
- Remove anything that takes your time away from having quality time with yourself, your spouse, and your family.
Key #4 Abide in God’s Word
God’s word lights up the path to your destiny so you don’t stumble in the dark. He is the best guide because He created us. If you don’t know what you are to do or how to reach your potential, reading God’s word daily will sure open your eyes and your heart to what He created you to accomplish.
- Dedicate time to read God’s word.
- Spend time meditating on God’s word.
- Choose a time that is comfortable for you to make to ensure you do it.
- Find literature that will inspire you to read the bible and spend time with God.
Key#5 Remain in God’s Love
His love casts out all fear and leads us to a place of hope and faith. No lie can stand in the face of God’s love. As the best gardener, his love uproots any lies embedded in our minds. To ensure you stay connected to God’s love, here are 3 steps you can do daily throughout the day.
- Worship: Simply declare who God is in your life throughout your day.
- Dialogue: Pray as though you were speaking with God. As we talk with Him, God reveals his heart towards me and makes see ourselves through His eyes.
In order to thrive in motherhood, we have to start somewhere. There is no time like the present. It will take time and consistency. Writer and Coach John Maxwell says,
“You cannot win if you do not begin! The people who get ahead in the world are the ones who look for circumstances they want, and if they can’t find them, they make them.”
Sandrine Tucker came to America as a refugee 17 years ago at the age of 17. Not only did she find freedom in America, but she found freedom in God from her trauma. Her mission since has been to point other women to God to heal their brokenness, give them freedom, and lead them in discovering their purpose. She resides in Greenville, NC with her husband and five children, ages 6, 5, 3, 1.5 and one on the way. She is currently working on launching Flourish Women; which will debut in August, 2017. When she is not homeschooling her kids, you can find Sandrine on instagram where she encourages moms to thrive.